A religious upbringing has some definite advantages, but it is not without its downsides either.  Some of us were raised in traditions that emphasized sinfulness to the exclusion of blessedness.  More than that, some well-meaning spiritual instruction ends up growing self-doubt and fear, where the teachers thought they were sowing seeds of humility.

I was taught Paul’s injunction “not to think of yourself more highly than you ought,” (Romans 12:3) long before I heard Jesus saying that his followers “will do greater works than these,” (John 14:12).  In other words, I heard “Don’t get too big for your britches,” long before a word was whispered about “the places you’ll go.”

Healthy self-doubt is a good thing.  Think of the damage done by those who never spend a moment wondering if they could be wrong — the ones who are sure they know what’s right for them, for you, and for the world at large.

But a lot of self-doubt is not healthy at all.  Take, for example, Moses.

After God goes to the trouble to summon Moses through the means of a burning bush; after God reveals the plan to liberate Moses’ kinfolk; after God reveals the divine Name, Moses goes all, “Aw shucks,” on God.  Moses says, “I’m no smooth-talker.  I can’t represent you before Pharoah.”

Even after God reminds Moses that the One who created his mouth and gave him sight and hearing can probably supply all the help with public speaking that Moses will need, Moses asks God to send someone else.  (See Exodus 4:10-17)

Be careful what you ask for. 

God gives in to Moses’ fearful reluctance.  God allows Moses to take Aaron with him as his spokesman.   Aaron proved to be a mixed blessing at best, just as God warned.  (Remember, Aaron led the people in idolatrous worship of the Golden Calf.)

I don’t know if another Moses will read these words, but it’s possible.  It’s also possible that fear and self-doubt could cause that modern-day Moses to miss out on their calling – to miss out on the fullness of life that’s possible for those who trust even when they fear.

Humility can cross the line into distrust of the God who has called and equipped us.

Prayer:  I don’t know about greater works.  Just give me courage and trust to say yes to the work you’ve given me to do today.